The other day I was driving from Houston to Dallas, a most UN-inspiring stretch of road if ever there was one, listening to the sounds of Dora mesmerizing Knute in the backseat. At mile marker 203 on I-45 north I glanced at the batwatch. It was just after noon. This was, without a doubt synchronized – of that I was certain, and I picked up my phone and began to dial a number. A number I’d never dialed before.
And, she answered. Of course, the synchronization was off a little bit as she had to make a run to the Dairy Queen. I will fully accept that delay as a valid excuse. DQ Country stretches across the entire state of Texas, and you could miss almost anything, including church to hit DQ. She said she’d call me back. I went back to the mind-numbing driving northward.
Then the phone rang. And, it was all good. You see, in addition to guest posting on Rachel’s blog today, I, Holly the Anglophile, spent about half an hour talking to her this past Sunday. And, I cannot gush about her enough. We discussed so many trivial and huge topics.
Don’t you love the friendships this medium provides? Only through blogging would this have happened. Two people who know intimate details about one another, who have shared a little laughter & tears – yet have never met, conversing like old friends. I have to say, there was nary a pause in the conversation. When you know so much about a person already, the blind date factor is gone.
The main conversation focused on whether or not husbands are capable of “doing” the SAHM thing the way we do. Is it possible for them to keep the house, watch the kids, and maintain their sanity? We both happened to agree we really doubted it. And, as Rachel’s hubby is on duty while she is high rolling in Sin City, we wondered how well he would fare. Both Rachel and I agreed her hubs was going to sink or swim…and we secretly think this is going to be good for him.
Mothering is NOT an easy job. I learn this in at least ten posts a day, in addition to experiencing it myself. Husbands may get a few hours here or a day there when we escape the clutches of domesticity. But, do they really understand? I’ve often wonder if we all forced a week of mothering on them how large the robin’s egg blue box greeting us would be when we came home. Hmm. Remind me to plan a few days away to force Puppy to be in charge, okay?
What say you? Will it be feast or famine in the Kingdom of Southern Fairytales? I’m giving him the benefit of the doubt…and the Tiffany website url just in case.
Doing it for a few days is one thing. Doing it day in and day out is another completely.
I have had daytrips (okay two) where the boys stay with hubby and he does fine. Mostly because he doesn’t do the laundry, take them grocery shopping, make dinner, clean the house, do the dishes, take them to school, etc. I always make sure that is all done before I leave. Most of the time if I go away for a few hours he will take them to his folks’ house. Go figure.
Sure he is capable, and I’m sure he could do it. But I also think he would loose his mind.
And no. They don’t get it. And they never can unless they do it. My hubby tries to tell me he gets it (I think he is trying to score points) but he doesn’t. And really, that is okay. Cuz I will never understand the pressure he is under at work either. And I certainly couldn’t do what he does either. Nor would I want to. His job is insane.
Wow. Why don’t I just write a book here! 😉
I was just talking to my hubby yesterday about this. I realized he’s yet to take our daughter anywhere fun by himself. No craft time, no play time, no store, etc! Man, does he have it easy!
Then, when I went out of town, his mom swooped in and helped out!
I agree with Kathryn..no laundry, no cooking, no housecleaning, nothing extra just look after the kids! Many years ago when my 2 daughters were young, one was preschool and one was in grade 2 I left my hubby home with them. He had to take them to their activities which was skating at that time. He had to feed them food that I had prepared, get them ready for bed and then the oldest for school…He was exhausted when I got home and he did say “I don’t know how you do it”. Plus I always had time to craft or sew or do other needle crafts! Most men are not good at multi tasking. Women can do upteen things at once.
Mr. Hot has been doing the SAHM thing since Shortman was 5. Eleven years. He’s great at it, but then, my expectations for dinner waiting on the table and no dustbunnies in the corners sometimes take a hit.
(He does get a little strange every once in a while, though. Kinda like that look prisoners get when they think about how long their sentence really is!!!)
I’ve had this discussion with the Hubby. Even if he does the SAHD thing for two weeks, he still knows it’s going to end. So it’s not the same, will never be the same. He won’t wake up and say “yep. Going to do the same thing I did yesterday today and tomorrow when I will wake up, I will do it some more” for eighteen years (give or take 20 years when you’re stupid enough to have another baby as your oldest is graduating high school)
I give my hubby props when it’s due. He can look after the kids and fix them dinner. He actually loves to cook and is a chef so it comes rather natural. He can also do laundry and dishes.
As good as all that is he can not handle the kids alone by himself for more than a few hours. They all start getting on each other’s nerves. Though mostly because he does not do things the way I do.
I’m thinking Rachel’s husband will have no choice but to swim if he is going to survive her trip to Vegas!
Would. Not. Work. At least, not for more than a few days at a time. Take me, for instance. I have no idea how that friggin’ EXPENSIVE Kirby vacuum cleaner works, I don’t know HOW to load the dishwasher and PLEASE don’t ask me to clean the toilet.
I’m just sayin’.
Hubby cannot handle the peapod squad alone…not for very long anyway. And I cannot imagine him actually juggling that task with any housework. Scary stuff to even think about.
Dang it…I want DQ now.
As far as practical stuff.. My hubby can do the SAHM stuff.. laundry, cooking, cleaning.. can do it as well as I do.
It’s the psycho stuff..mentoring the kids.. figuring them out… that he has a harder time with!
Just stumbled into your blog today for the first time. From one TX mom to another – love your stories! Looking forward to more soon!
I’m not gonna lie . . . he does so many things way better than me. HE will never, ever hear me admit it.
I’m really lucky. This, I know.
I was so stinkin' thrilled when my phone rang and it was you, and so disappointed when I had to sign off to play at DQ! We had a great conversation and I can't wait to do it again!
I must say, Hubs' rocked. The house was clean, kids well fed and they went on field trips. Rookie Mistake.. he kicked Daddydom butt!!
Holly, you rocked this! thank you for honoring my blog with your fabulousness and for being a wonderful blog and phone friend. <3 you!